Skip to content

Memories

Near the summit of a high mountain, a young man sat in a rocky alcove.  Wandering the universal consciousness, he came across an old man. They greeted one another as friends do, and the old man bid his friend to follow him toward the summit. It wasn’t long before the elder pointed out a way-mark.

“Those rocks are memories from your current life. Do you see anything in particular?”

“Yes,” said the young man. “A light shining through the rocks.”

Indeed, there was a small point of light shining through a gap halfway up the way-mark which stood at about two metres tall.

“An old,  insignificant memory holding you back. You have no further need of it. Take a rock from the ground and use it to block out that light.”

The younger man did as his friend instructed and they walked away.

A Cliché

“Never give up.” It’s probably one of  the most cliché phrases we see on The Internet, family, friends and colleagues repeat it too. It might be argued that for many, it’s a heavily ‘drummed in’ mantra. Sadly though, people do give up and often rising stars disappear into the back of our memories before they achieved their full ‘stardom.’ Maybe they were never meant to in the first place.

I often remind myself never to give up but the question is; never give up on what? For me, it is the path I am following during this life and it is the only thing I will never give up on. At any time, there are a number of projects that I might be involved with and some of those will eventually be shelved or completely thrown away.

There are things I will never discard, they are simple. I believe in peace and will do whatever I can to promote it. I respect people regardless of their beliefs because we are all universal beings and we have love at our cores. Good or bad, the rest is life.

Wow, there are four sentences in that last paragraph and they are fraught with possibilities of so many interpretations. The third in particular raises a few issues and that’s putting it mildly.

Do I respect terrorists? Pedophiles? Rapists? Donald Trump?

No, I do not. But while some of their behaviors aren’t consistent with my ideas of positive humanity, I still recognize that they are universal beings, albeit with a problem or two. The main one being ‘fear.’

There is no point in delving deeply into the fear of each individual. I can’t do that anyway, I don’t know their circumstances. But I will ask you to spend a few moments considering this idea of ‘fear’ as a motivator for particular behaviors. Like, never giving up.

The fear of failure makes people give up. The fear of putting self in the spotlight. Fear of the unknown. Fear of jumping into the mix with people who one perceives as being highly successful. I could go on all day and not run out of fears. So what motivates fear?

A simple answer to that question is experience. Our ego reminds us of something from our past and we respond to the urges of the ego by giving up. This is why we need to listen to the voice of our intuition, soul, whatever you wish to call it. It knows peace and love, hope, charity, understanding and most of all, it knows the path you need to follow.

The ego does its level best to protect you but all it has is experience and some of that may not be so good. Take racism for example. It’s something that has to be learned from some sort of experience. You may have read that racism is a very negative and hurtful response to people yet experience tells you otherwise.

So, where does the “Never Give Up” mantra fit into this? Simple really. If you have found the quiet yet self-assured voice of your soul, intuition . . . keep listening. If not, listen harder, the voice is there, you can trust it. Never give up on yourself but sometimes you have to let go of people or things that don’t sit comfortably on your path.

Reaction Time

I doubt many of us will do the math on this but, have you ever wondered how much time is swallowed by your reaction to things passing through your orbit? No, not things that matter, I’m thinking about those that don’t.

Last week for example, I found myself lost in a thread about something the British foreign minister reportedly said to the French president. Apparently, Boris suggested building a bridge across the channel to aid trade. Whoosh, ten minutes gone. Yes, the idea is completely preposterous. One person put it quite well by asking, how on earth can a bridge be built over one of the busiest shipping lanes in the world and keep it open when the wind blows? Look at the bridges in the UK, the wind blows, many close to high-sided vehicles.

If we didn’t spend so much time reacting to things that don’t matter or to those things we have no power over; we would spend less time feeling bothered and relax in our lives the same way our mind relaxes in meditation. Yes, there was humor in the ‘Boris thread’ and of course humor is good for us but, ten minutes gone and never to return. I must choose my distractions wisely.

That sounds a little dark doesn’t it? Not to worry, this post ends here because I have writing and editing to get on with and I’m sure you have things to do too.

I hope you have a wonderful day.

Namasté, S

#UniversalChildrensDay

I spotted the hash tag for Universal Childrens Day on Twitter this morning and had to smile at the relevance to recent events and discussions at The Costello dinner table during the last few days.

Daughter aged 17.

I’m tired about all the comments at school about what it means to follow certain BAC* programmes. According to students and teachers, the only programme worth anything is the BAC-S (mostly science). They think ‘S’ students are the achievers and above the rest.

*Baccalaureate

She doesn’t follow the ‘S’ programme but is a high achiever. I’m not saying that as a doting parent, I base it on facts evidenced by her grades. For several years she has said that her goal is to be a surgeon. Sadly though, teachers don’t support her goal, they are consumed with the idea that you have to reside in a particular box to become a doctor and Kalyani is one box below. We have heard (and ignored) their comments at parents evenings because we know that our daughter will follow her path and, with 100% support from us. Some doctors too don’t support the teacher point of view and good news from the president.

A review of the system is underway. Exactly where that will go we aren’t yet sure but will it force a change of attitude on the coal face where teachers’ seem to push young people away from their life-path?

I told the class tutor that I am going to university in Toulouse to study to become a lawyer. She said I wouldn’t be able to achieve that.

That came from a dinner discussion with our son, Sasha. He is currently in the final year of a BAC course that last years class tutor said he wouldn’t be able to manage. He is scoring grades above the class average.

At the end of the semester (Christmas), the class council will meet and decide whether or not to support Sasha’s choice. The tutor will vote against, other members of the council are expected to follow her lead.

What does this do to a young persons confidence?

Facing judgment and disapproval for our choices can be painful. But over time it becomes clear that others’ judgment often has more to do with their own fears and insecurities than with our shortcomings. They might feel betrayed, confused, or even envious. Seeing things from this angle can help take negative comments less personally and increase our understandings of others.

We encourage our six children to follow their dreams and impress upon them that not all dreams are created equal. The life we want to means making choices that may go against the expectations of communities or culture. Stigma, isolation, and uncertainty might occur as a result but the less travelled road has its advantages.

While nothing in life is risk-free, some paths have clearer roadmaps than others. Carving a difficult path involves trial and error, which can also mean greater potential for failure. Experiencing failure can help us change our relationship to it, and see it as a learning opportunity rather than a verdict on our ability.

There’s no shortage of opinions about what it takes to make life meaningful or the path we ought to follow. Some argue that life doesn’t have meaning until one gets married or has kids, others place a higher value on professional success. Personally, I follow what can be described as a mystical path. Meaning is a deeply personal, subjective experience guided by my intuition. Research suggests that the types of experiences that give us a sense of meaning—like kindness or overcoming adversity are not constrained by culturally-defined milestones or opinions.

On this Universal Childrens Day, we should be promoting the needs and goals of our children and helping them achieve rather than pushing them toward paths we see rather than those they hope for. At any given moment, it is they who ought to decide how their story will progress.

1 3 4 5 9